No Yous, Only Me & Adonai

I want to go to a place where it's not my fault. Here, its always me, always something I didn't do right because of something I didn't know. And here, not knowing doesn't make me exempt. I am responsible even for the things I was not aware, and that's law. Everything that happens in my life is a consequence of some thought some action of mine. To a micro its because of me. What thought did I think for this to manifest the way it did? What did I do to deserve this? I am my own worst enemy. I am my only enemy. If I have a hater, its because of me. I bare complete responsibilty. It's not your fault you hate me, its mine. Besides, there is no you. There is only me, and God. And soon after, It Is God That Is All That Is. But that is only faith... it is my strength and my burden.